Heteronormativity isn’t just about the presumption that everyone is heterosexual. The expectation that boys woo girls feeds into your mind the expectation that relationships are necessary for fulfilment, and you are less than if you are not having particular kinds of sex with a particular, and a particular kind of, person at particular intervals. It’s about what Lauren Berlant calls the love plot, in which love is produced as a generic text enabling society to interpret your life as following certain conventions. It’s not about what you want, it’s about what you’re supposed to want. You’re not encouraged to think about what you want in relationships, if anything, so much as you are encouraged to fit a script. Heteronormativity messes things up for everyone, straight people included.
Conversations with the family are always fun… my mother thinks lesbians are only ugly girls whilst my sister thinks they are ones who have been raped… also bisexuality does not exist.
Boyfriend got me a lovely present for working my butt off this month. If 7 day weeks always come with perfume they are a little more bearable. #perfume #daisydream #marcjacobs #love #pretty #blue #daisy
If you’ve cut a negative person from your life, whether they were abusive or just someone who wasn’t a positive influence on you, at NO POINT in your healing are you required to let that person BACK into your life.
Your healing should never be contingent on you bringing people who have harmed you back into your space. Your healing does not require you to give these people a second chance to harm you.
you don’t have to forgive them either, it’s a step towards letting them back in, but more importantly it’s ok to be angry with someone who hurt you and it’s not unhealthy. If someone did something to upset you or make you mad you don’t have to rise above it or forgive and forget. I’m not saying hold onto it with a burning passions which eats away at you. But you most certainly don’t owe anyone your forgiveness and you also don’t owe them the opportunity to make it up to you.